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The Steeple Times is an online magazine with a following of upto 880,000 unique views per day on our best day yet.

  • We have 91,000 daily subscribers by email.

  • We typically average around 320,000 unique views per day.

  • We currently have 65 contributing authors who range from students to the actor, writer and producer Steven Berkoff and the champion jockey Frankie Dettori.

Combining a mix of society's last word and both wit and wisdom, The Steeple Times covers food, drink and fine dining as well as luxury, travel, the arts, individuals of influence and current affairs in the United Kingdom, America and elsewhere. We are best described as being akin to "a cross between The Huffington Post and Private Eye".

 

The magazine's following is affluent, engaged and international. With 41% of readers coming from the UK and 38% from America, The Steeple Times also has strong presence within Canadian, Italian, German and Australian territories.

 

CHARACTERS

The unique set

May 8, 2017

Brenda from Bristol

by General

Pearl clad pensioner ‘Brenda from Bristol’ became the Gillian Duffy of the 2017 General Election when she shared her views about politics with a BBC reporter. This 75-year old retired secretary spoke for the nation in remarking: “You’re joking? Not another one!” Oh for God’s sake, I can’t honestly… I can’t stand this. There’s too much … Continue reading “Brenda from Bristol”

April 19, 2017

The Cross Word Couple (AKA ‘The Crossword Couple’)

by Matthew Steeples

Though never a cross word was uttered between this duo during their visits to the sadly now defunct Chelsea restaurant La Brasserie, their dislike of what they perceived as “loud music” (and other forms of noise) made them retreat to a quiet corner. Known to occasionally ‘share’ a cocktail – though firm believers in “one … Continue reading “The Cross Word Couple (AKA ‘The Crossword Couple’)”

October 22, 2016

The Pret Prayer

by General

A new addition to the South Kensington neighbourhood in October 2016, the Pret Prayer likes to get his mat out in front of all and sundry in Pret A Manager in Old Brompton Road, SW7. He also likes to paint and listen to his radio – on full volume, of course. He then joins the … Continue reading “The Pret Prayer”

October 15, 2016

The Pret Sleeper

by Matthew Steeples

Spotted early in the mornings in Pret A Manager in South Kensington, the Pret Sleeper wears loafers and an entirely black outfit. He usually purchases nothing and sits and sleeps. Occasionally he takes out a notebook and biro but only once has he been heard to speak; he choose to ring his bank manager about … Continue reading “The Pret Sleeper”

April 25, 2016

Prince John Zylinski

by General

A cross between Donald Trump and Liberace in terms of his liking for all things gold in interiors, Ealing based Prince John Zylinski is an eccentric property tycoon with a taste for duels and ballet dancing.

April 19, 2016

The Pret Spitter

by General

Always in a red ski jacket and always with a trolley and umbrella, The Pret Spitter is a most unpleasant vagrant.

March 6, 2016

Marina Gibson

by General

Fly-fisherwoman Marina Gibson is an ambassador for amongst others Orvis and Indigo Ivy and describes her passion as an “unreachable itch”.

December 16, 2015

Margaret Wooliscroft

by General

Described as a “disagreeable old trout” by her very own lawyer, farmer Margaret Wooliscroft was jailed for 28 months in December 2015 for terrorizing the residents of Brindley Ford, Stoke-on-Trent.

October 15, 2015

Angelo Vizcaino

by General

A popular and hard-working waiter at La Brasserie in London’s Brompton Cross, pint-sized Angelo Vizcaino delights in telling customers about his love of Cuba and his pet dog.

September 27, 2015

Mr Penny Farthing

by General

Often spotted on the roads of Kensington and Chelsea, as little is known about Mr Penny Farthing as his fellow eccentric The Fantasy Cyclist.

September 14, 2015

Adolfo Orsi, Jr.

by General

“One of the biggest important players on the classic car scene”, Adolfo Orsi, Jr. is always clad in a blazer and generally sports a Panama hat.

June 29, 2015

Mikel Ruffinelli

by General

Despite being an iceberg beyond being just larger than life, Californian Mikel Ruffinelli describes her eight foot wide “diva hips” as “looking beautiful”.

May 17, 2015

Ziyanda Palesa Tutu

by General

Archbishop Desmond Tutu’s self-proclaimed “first granddaughter” also describes herself as a “qualified wine judge”.

April 27, 2015

Kensington Claus

by General

It’s Christmas every day for this bearded giant. Generally spotted in the pubs of South Kensington and always on his own, Kensington Claus has favoured drinking spots at each bar he visits

April 25, 2015

The Knightsbridge rose seller

by General

A well-known fixture each and every evening at Knightsbridge restaurants including San Lorenzo and Scalini during the 1990s and 2000s

April 9, 2015

Paul and Selena Bailey

by General

Having sold their telephone conferencing empire for £28 million in 2012, Paul and Selena Bailey became the first people in the UK to own the £3 million “Holy Trinity of Hypercars”

April 1, 2015

John Bly

by General

Having begun his career at Sotheby’s, John Bly joined his family at their firm of antiques dealers in Tring, Hertfordshire.

January 4, 2015

Malavath Poorna

by General

The youngest girl to have reached the summit of Everest, Indian Malavath Poorna scaled the world’s highest mountain in May 2014 at the age of 13 years and 11 months.

December 23, 2014

Linda Sandler

by General

Featured in the late Dominick Dunne’s Power, Privilege and Justice, Linda Sandler is the ex-wife of a multi-millionaire named Joel Sandler.

December 6, 2014

Pablo Salcedo

by Matthew Steeples

This cheerful barman lives in Chelsea and works at La Brasserie in South Kensington.

November 26, 2014

June and Leon Bernicoff

by Matthew Steeples

Channel 4 Gogglebox stars June and Leon Bernicoff met at teacher-training college in 1955.

October 10, 2014

Sarah Meakin

by General

Based in San Francisco and the co-founder of the Tal-y-Tara tea and polo shop

September 18, 2014

Julia Bradbury

by General

Nicknamed “the walking man’s crumpet”, Dublin born, Rutland based television presenter Julia Bradbury has over 50,000 followers on Twitter. She fronted the BBC’s Countryfile for five years and has also presented shows such as Kill It, Cook It, Eat It and Take on the Twisters. Bradbury views the late fell walker Alfred Wainwright to be a … Continue reading “Julia Bradbury”

August 30, 2014

Raine Spencer; Raine, Countess Spencer (AKA “Acid Raine”)

by General

This thrice married daughter of the novelist Dame Barbara Cartland was allegedly fathered by Prince George, Duke of Kent and has worked her way through five titles. Upwardly mobile, she’s been described as “larger than life” but was so unpopular with her step-children that they nicknamed her “Acid Raine”. During Mohamed Fayed’s ownership of Harrods, … Continue reading “Raine Spencer; Raine, Countess Spencer (AKA “Acid Raine”)”

August 21, 2014

Candida Lycett Green (1942 – 2014; nicknamed “Wibz”)

by General

The daughter of John Betjeman, Candida Lycett Green was English through and through. An author, conservationist and horsewoman, Lycett Green was a bohemian member of the Private Eye set whom lived by the Reverend Sydney Smith’s “take the short view of human life, never further than dinner or tea”. She began her marriage to the … Continue reading “Candida Lycett Green (1942 – 2014; nicknamed “Wibz”)”

June 30, 2014

The musical tramp

by Matthew Steeples

A can of beer in hand, this bearded wanderer likes to serenade customers outside Brompton Road restaurants such as La Brasserie and Aubaine. He’s been known to do handstands and especially loves persuading old ladies to dance. A donation of £1 will have him jump into a jig.  

June 25, 2014

Doris Thompson MBE OBE (1903 – 2004) and Geoffrey Thompson (1936 – 2004)

by Matthew Steeples

This mother and son duo were the stalwarts that built Britain’s most popular seaside attraction, the 40-acre Blackpool Pleasure Beach. Fairgrounds were their life and even at 95, Malvern Ladies’ College educated Doris Thompson MBE OBE was the first to ride her park’s 100mph Playstation ride. After getting off, she gamely stated: “That’s the closest … Continue reading “Doris Thompson MBE OBE (1903 – 2004) and Geoffrey Thompson (1936 – 2004)”

February 24, 2014

Charity Charity

by Matthew Steeples

This brilliantly named lady ought to be the head of the Charity Commission. She’d be much more use than William Shawcross CVO (who is paid £50,000 per annum for two days per week). Charity launched Crunchy Nutters for Kellogg’s in 2002 and was appointed global creative director on Head & Shoulders at Saatchi & Saatchi … Continue reading “Charity Charity”

January 1, 2014

Kimi Räikkönen

by Matthew Steeples

This talented Finnish Formula One champion is not known for being the most forthcoming interviewee but is the fifth highest paid sportsman in the world with an estimated salary of around £31 million per year. When asked: “How does it feel to drive at 300 km/h?”, Räikkönen responded: “It feels normal”. Of what makes him … Continue reading “Kimi Räikkönen”

December 22, 2013

Elisabetta and Francesca Grillo

by Matthew Steeples

The daughters of a convicted Italian kidnapper were cleared of defrauding Nigella Lawson and Charles Saatchi at a trial at Isleworth Crown Court in December 2013. These “kitchen confidantes” stated that they were “treated worse than Filipino slaves” and added that they’d “rather go to jail” than live in Battersea. There’ll be no more cupcakes … Continue reading “Elisabetta and Francesca Grillo”

November 28, 2013

Kester Thomas (1975 – 2013)

by General

Described as “one of the nicest guys on London’s club and bar scene”, Kester Thomas worked at Kitts, the Buddha Bar and The Sanderson. His drink making ability was second to none. This “truly unique gentleman” passed far too young but he’s definitely now mixing the finest cocktails in the sky.

November 11, 2013

Gavin Rankin

by General

The Queen and every American ambassador to Britain have dined at Rankin’s Bruton Place restaurant, Bellamy’s, since it opened in 2004 and of it A.A. Gill commented: “You could eat here once a week for the rest of your life”. More recently, this suave gentleman host has established Gavin Rankin Fine Art and deals in … Continue reading “Gavin Rankin”

November 2, 2013

Marina Oswald Porter (born Marina Nikolayevna Prusakova, Russian: Марина Николаевна Прусакова)

by Matthew Steeples

Russian born and the wife of John F. Kennedy’s killer, Oswald Porter met Lee Harvey Oswald when he defected to the Soviet Union in 1961. The couple settled in Dallas, Texas in 1962 and after the murder, she married her neighbour Kenneth Porter in 1965. Helena Bomham Carter played her in the 1993 television film … Continue reading “Marina Oswald Porter (born Marina Nikolayevna Prusakova, Russian: Марина Николаевна Прусакова)”

October 29, 2013

Elena Salvoni (1920 – 2016)

by Matthew Steeples

This Clerkenwell born stalwart ran a Fitzrovia restaurant named after her until she turned 90 but was cruelly ejected by Corus Hotels.

October 28, 2013

Sultan Kösen

by Matthew Steeples

A Turkish farmer, Kösen became the world’s tallest man in 2009 at 8’3” and also holds the record for the largest hands at 27.5cm and the largest foot at 36.5cm. He married in October 2013 and stated: “How unfortunate I could not find a suitable girl of my own size”. All he wants now is … Continue reading “Sultan Kösen”

October 10, 2013

Boaty Boatwright (also known as Boaty Boatwright Baker)

by Matthew Steeples

This New York based casting director and talent agent has worked on The Man Who Would Be King, Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory, To Kill A Mockingbird and Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Gore Vidal was a “great friend” and Michael Caine once described Boatwright’s Sunday lunch parties as “most interesting”. Hers is considered “one of … Continue reading “Boaty Boatwright (also known as Boaty Boatwright Baker)”

August 19, 2013

Cedric Robinson MBE

by Matthew Steeples

The 25th individual since 1548 to be The Queen’s Guide to the Sands, Robinson is the royally appointed guide who has assisted thousands cross Morecambe Bay since 1963. Appointed by the Duchy of Lancaster, Robinson has written three books about his unpaid role and once stated: “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else”.

August 17, 2013

Oliver Newton

by Matthew Steeples

This London based antiques expert has a captivating enthusiasm for silver and fine craftmanship.

June 8, 2013

Don who’s Donna at night

by Matthew Steeples

By day this Walton Street resident can be spotted drinking coffee and dressed quite conventionally. He is better known, however, for donning earrings and styling himself rather like the former Eastenders character Pat Butcher by night. His favoured watering hole was previously The Admiral Codrington but he hasn’t been seen there that often of late.

May 11, 2013

Captain Pugwash (AKA ‘Captain’ Michael M. Maricic)

by Matthew Steeples

This old chap wanders the Fulham Road in a seafaring cap and claims to be a “restaurant consultant and promoter of new faces (models and actresses)”. He’s also “writing a biography that will be fascinating to read” and is “recognised by the late Honourable president [sic] of the United States Roland [sic] Regan”. Bonkers.

April 3, 2013

Peter Grace OBE (1938 – 2013)

by Matthew Steeples

Grace by name and graceful by nature, New Zealander Peter Grace was one of the greatest men in polo and the owner of the Ascot Park Polo Club.

March 17, 2013

Jim Bowen (born Peter Williams)

by Matthew Steeples

This witty Northern comedian began his career as deputy headmaster at Caton Primary School in Lancashire. Best known as the host of Bullseye between 1981 and 1985, Bowen’s back in the limelight as many suggest he’s a lookalike of the new Pope. His BBC Radio Lancashire show was axed in 1999 after he referred to … Continue reading “Jim Bowen (born Peter Williams)”

March 3, 2013

Derek Bell MBE

by Matthew Steeples

A five times winner at Le Mans, this British racing icon also won the Daytona 24 three times and the World Sportscar Championship twice. Described as “one of the most liked drivers of his generation”, Bell suffered minor burns whilst working with Steve McQueen on the 1971 film Le Mans and is now a global … Continue reading “Derek Bell MBE”

January 26, 2013

Pamela Jennings (better known as “Soho Pam”, 1964 – 2013)

by Matthew Steeples

A professional beggar who was well known in Soho and Pimlico. She lived in a £7 a night hostel but preferred to be found in The French House. She liked Gap jeans and was a gambling addict but surprisingly was a teetotaler. The thought of crossing Oxford Street is said to have worried her greatly.

December 31, 2012

£50 grifter

by Matthew Steeples

He looks like a harmless old buffer but he truly isn’t. On approach, there’s always a tale of woe and then a demand for £50. His wife has died in Gloucester and he hasn’t got the train fare or he needs a hotel room for the night as his wallet was stolen. Whatever the story … Continue reading “£50 grifter”

Parrot Man

by Matthew Steeples

Parrot Man is often to be spotted in London’s Fulham Road with his glorious birds.

November 24, 2012

Jocelyn Wildenstein (née Périsset and also known as “Jocelynnys Dayannnys da Silva Bezerra”)

by Matthew Steeples

If one spent $2,000,000 on cosmetic surgery, one would expect to end up looking fantastic. It didn’t quite work out in the case of the billionairess “Bride of Wildenstein,” though, as instead she discovered the husband she thought she’d please in bed with a 19-year old Russian. Feline like in appearance, the purr of this … Continue reading “Jocelyn Wildenstein (née Périsset and also known as “Jocelynnys Dayannnys da Silva Bezerra”)”

November 12, 2012

John Gaze (1947 – 2011)

by Matthew Steeples

A gent who operated by routine, whisky and 40 cigarettes a day. This clubman’s knowledge of London history was phenomenal and he was dedicated to his role as parish clerk at St. Michael’s Cornhill. Gaze, a Russian icon dealer with a shop in the Piccadilly Arcade, lived a life full of dramas that included being … Continue reading “John Gaze (1947 – 2011)”

September 21, 2012

Charlie Richardson (1934 – 2012)

by Matthew Steeples

This father of six and his gang were amongst the most notorious and sadistic criminals in South London in the 1960s. Using scrap metal and slot machine businesses as fronts, they ran fraud, protection rackets and received stolen goods. They were best known for nailing those who displeased them to floor and then made them … Continue reading “Charlie Richardson (1934 – 2012)”

June 12, 2012

The Rt. Hon. Baroness Shackleton of Belgravia LVO (Fiona Shackleton)

by Matthew Steeples

The “Steel Magnolia” is described as having “charm and resoluteness.” The cousin of Nigella Lawson and George Monbiot is one of the country’s finest solicitors but also trained as a cordon bleu chef. Heather Mills threw a jug of water over her head at the final settlement hearing of her divorce from Sir Paul McCartney … Continue reading “The Rt. Hon. Baroness Shackleton of Belgravia LVO (Fiona Shackleton)”

May 11, 2012

Nancy Wake AC GM (1912 – 2011)

by Matthew Steeples

Churchill’s most highly decorated special agent. A resistance heroine who lived at The Stafford Hotel from 2001 to 2003 and regaled visitors with tales of her time as the legendary “White Mouse.” Her tipple of choice, gin and tonics, flowed as freely as did the stories of her time interviewing Hitler in the 1930s and … Continue reading “Nancy Wake AC GM (1912 – 2011)”

May 7, 2012

Claus Von Bülow

by Matthew Steeples

Tried twice for the attempted murder of his wife, Sunny, who remained in a vegetative state for some 28 years, this socialite and writer has the most mischievous of wits. Subject of the Golden Globe award winning film Reversal of Fortune starring Jeremy Irons and Glenn Close, this distinguished gent is also renowned for telling … Continue reading “Claus Von Bülow”

May 5, 2012

Alexander Fiske-Harrison

by Matthew Steeples

An Englishman who also happens to be a bullfighter, actor and writer.

April 28, 2012

Umberto Scomparin

by Matthew Steeples

You won’t meet a maître d’ like him. Scomparin does a mean Liverpudlian impression and following a stint at the now defunct Ilia, he’s moving on to pastures new. An evening in his company is always going to be jolly.

Lord Lucan (also known as Richard John Bingham, 7th Earl of Lucan)

by Matthew Steeples

“Lucky,” as he was known to his friends, was a man whose luck ran out on the 8th November 1974. A prolific gambler, Lord Lucan disappeared following the killing of his children’s nanny and he was subsequently declared legally dead in October 1999. Conspiracy theories as to his supposed whereabouts continue to this day. Amongst … Continue reading “Lord Lucan (also known as Richard John Bingham, 7th Earl of Lucan)”

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