Monday, December 23, 2024
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MOVERS & SHAKERS

Prince (Not So) Private Strikes Again

Prince Harry’s decision to contribute a foreword to a book speaks volumes about him being nothing but an opportunist and hypocrite; meanwhile elsewhere his copycat wife is condemned as a fashion faux.

Cash & Rocket & Trafficking 2021

As alleged underage girl trafficker Ghislaine Maxwell’s brother bigs her up to the American media, Julie Brangstrup, the woman who organised the 2019 Cash & Rocket car rally the mucky madam joined in on unbelievably announces she’s fundraising for trafficked women.

The MeGain & Randy Show

It’s time for the ‘MeGain & Randy Show’… As dopey dipstick Diane Abbott MP sticks her gumboots into the fallout of the Duchess of Sussex’s car crash interview, the scandalous Prince Andrew should again be called to answer questions.

40,000 turn on Mental Monster Merelize van der Merwe

As our Change.org petition seeking to ban giraffe slayer Merelize van der Merwe tops 40,000 signatures, the psycho publicity addict shared a CBS documentary of another mental monster killing a giraffe.

Houses of Horror SOLD

Houses of Horror SOLD – As New York residence of croaked paedo Jeffrey Epstein goes into contract for 192% less than was asked for it, London home of mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell supposedly nears sale for 400% more than she paid for it also.

Costly Carrie

The extravagance of Carrie Symonds plainly knows no bounds; what ‘Costly Carrie’ wants, cost unconscious puppet mistress Carrie gets.

The Prince & The Paedos

EXCLUSIVE – As his spin doctor “steps down,” Prince Andrew’s “buried” links to paedophiles other than Jeffrey Epstein is again highlighted.

A Brolly Wally

“Britain’s most troublesome brolly” goes to auction on eBay after its wally owner nearly gets shot by armed police whilst carrying it.

Fergie Goes Potty

Sarah, Duchess of York gets overexcited about a potty on YouTube, yet fails to address what went on in mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell’s bathtub in 2001.

Heirless – Hair Horror

As wicked witch Ghislaine Maxwell complains about losing her hair and being “forced to clean a shower with a broom,” her ‘bestie’ Prince Andrew trended on Twitter for all the wrong reasons.

Mystery Meg

‘Daily Star’ hilariously mocks the Duchess of Sussex and in doing so turns her into ‘Mystery Meg’ Yesterday, the Daily Mail’s Richard Eden tweeted to share the best of the coverage of the former Meghan...

Farting Fergie

Sarah Ferguson gets overexcited over a farting book, but still hasn’t declared if she’s repaid a loan from paedo Jeffrey Epstein.

Heroine of the Hour 2021 – Pauline Bridge

82-year-old granny Pauline Bridge gets up at 5am daily to deliver newspapers on her bicycle; she’s quite the contrast to bicycling pensioner and funeral crasher Theresa Doyle.

Modest Madeley (And ‘Mummy’ Finnigan)

Alleged shoplifter and ‘modern day Dorian Gray’ Richard Madeley attempts to convince ‘Mirror’ readers that his relationship with alleged old soak ‘mummy’ Judy Finnigan is “normal.”

Post-Pandemic Pillock Alexa Chung

Fashion fruitcake Alexa Chung arrogantly announces that she has no interest in anything other than “endless parties” in “post-pandemic” times.

Moron of the Moment 2021 – Stephen Bear

Shameless scumbag sex pest and dog abuser Stephen Bear yet again proves himself to be the finest example of all that is wrong in once Great Britain.

Ghastly Ghislaine Goes 50/1

Odds of Donald Trump pardoning mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell move to 50/1 from 3/1 earlier just as Joe Exotic’s supporters start planning a “pizza party” for him.

Theresa The Tea Leaf

Tea leaf Theresa May lookalike goes on the rampage in Hereford and robs a purse; at least she didn’t grab ‘The Donald’s’ hand this time round (or have to share a curry with rotten paedo Rolf Harris).

Hero of the Hour – Andy from Argos

Grimsby resident takes with good humour someone attaching an Argos sign to his house on New Year’s Day whilst journalist reporting story of it goes all Miss Marple.

Distraction Dawn

Deranged dope Dawn Ward uses the ‘distraction technique’ by quitting ‘Real Housewives of Cheshire’ as she faces a trial for racism and cocaine possession.