Monday, December 30, 2024

Draconian Drinking

Brexit bore Tim Martin, chairman of Wetherspoons yet again shows himself to be a draconian drip; what will this nutty nuisance ban next?

On Monday, the deranged dimwit Tim Martin, chairman of the J. D. Wetherspoon pub company, announced: “Many of our customers are keen to celebrate Brexit.” Speaking of tariffs, the nutty know-all added: “Consumers hold the whip hand in these negotiations, not governments.”

 

Meanwhile, on Sunday, the Mirror published news that staff at the 900 branch chain are to be given body cameras because of a “shocking rise in physical and sexual attacks on workers.” Frankly, given Mr Martin’s aggressive stance on many issues – including banning dogs because the staff “are sick of picking up poop,” prohibiting the use of social media in his outlets and not allowing European alcohol brands to be served –  is anyone surprised?

 

Elsewhere last week, it was reported that Wetherspoons are now draconianly limiting customers with children to just two alcoholic drinks each. In response, Rupert Murray pointed out in The Telegraph yesterday: “Here’s a new business idea for you: hanging around in Wetherspoons loos selling moonshine to thirsty parents. Thirsty parents who have already downed their allotted two pints. They’ve probably smashed their glasses over a nearby skull and trashed the joint. Mothers and fathers are, after all, Begbie from Trainspotting in sheep’s clothing. This is the only possible explanation for why Wetherspoons has banned anyone looking after children from being served anything more than a brace of beverages.”

 

Alternatively, just follow our lead and join those boycotting this ghastly chain frequented by “boozed up mums” who actually leave their kids at home and staffed by supposed racists. Who on earth would want to drink a “Brexit Bomb” (Martin’s new alternative to Jägermeister) anyway?

 

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5 COMMENTS

  1. Sounds like he’s got the right ideas other than on limiting booze!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You should join him celebrating FREEDOM DAY tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And then celebrate that you can kick out the immigrant trash!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Get the boats ready!!!!!!!!!!!! And let the Castlemaine flow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. T W runs a very successful and profitable company. He is reversing the trend of closing pubs by opening more this year. Brexit is a great result. Europe is faced with more integration with a failing Euro.
    More exits on the cards.
    Celebrate tomorrow Mathew

  3. So a man who has nearly single handedly supported home grown craft beer makers against ghastly danish German etc lagers, who has retained a pricing structure whereby you can buy wine and beer at affordable prices and at the same time made himself one if the richest people in the uk is a drip then I applaud drips
    This hand ringing because Brexit has happened needs to stop and you need to get a life.

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